Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Day 40 I Do Believe In God and Prayer

I am getting around to this waaay later than I would like. I got caught napping last semester and got myself a D in Economic Analysis, so I am hypersensitive to my grades this semester. I had only gotten one B before that and it bothered the hell out of me, so think what a D did! So this year, I am staying on top of my hybrid classes and their electronic assignments and getting my A's back baby!

I have had two days in a row of around 1300 calories, not by way of planning,I just seem to have a wife that is getting the whole calorie thing and making better suppers in the spirit of the lifestyle change. I had around 635 calories by the time I got home. Kathy had cooked me a boneless skinless chicken breast and a cup of green beans for supper! I was ecstatic to have such a good and filling meal and only spend 400 calories on it! I then snacked on something I been craving and since I was only at 1045 calories for the day, I went for it. I had me a tablespoon and a half of peanut butter smeared on the pita bread that Sean and I love so much! I topped that off with a glass of milk, only now, I drink 1% baby! Woo hoo! So I was almost content but I decided that I would also eat me one of those low fat sugar free puddings Lauren has been munching on lately. It wasn't bad, especially for 60 calories, but it wasn't great either. I am on the fence.

So I was out getting a couple of mile walk around the neighborhood this morning. I swear to you folks, I had no idea that I was a slow walker solely because I was fat! I killed lap times again this morning. I got two miles in at just under 28 minutes!! I was so stoked! But while walking, I revisited something I have thought about before and just haven't gotten around to discussing on here before. I hope not to offend anyone that reads this blog, but if I do, then so be it. I am a man of faith. I believe strongly in God and his never ending love for us, and Jesus who died on the cross to save us. So here is my story. Before this journey started, I had tried in the recent past to get back on the "diet wagon" but for whatever reason, I just couldn't get no traction. I would have limited successes only to sabotage them or just give up without any reason. I was so downtrodden about my failures. I began to ask God to help me, to get me that spark back, to make me understand how important this is. I was mad at myself for being selfish and not looking out for my family and their future like I should. I would get so sad when I imagined me dead and Kathy trying to make it without me. But I just couldn't get right in my mind to get going. So I prayed and I prayed multiple times to Him. Please God, don't let my ignorance and hard headedness keep me from the job I was put on this earth to do. Enter AOL. I am not an AOL subscriber. The only reason I had any contact with AOL is it was my job to monitor all the e mail addresses for the law firm I worked at throughout the day to see if any e mails needed to be routed. Well when you log into AOL, they have a few stories they are headlining that day. I typically didn't pay much attention to them other than when I was waiting for the screen to change to e mail mode rather than story mode. Well that day, the story about Sean scrolled across before the screen changed and I glanced it for just a second. I was intrigued, so after checking the e mail, I went back for Sean's story. I read the first paragraph and realized I needed to forward this link to my home e mail and check it out that night. I did, and I swear my eyes were opened! Sean's blog made me see the forest without being impeded by the trees, it made me realize that I had just been overthinking the process and having the wrong end goal. I wanted to get skinny, but not change the way I ate afterwards. I realized that day, it wasn't gonna happen that way. I had to make a lifestyle change. Seeing all those posts and knowing where Sean was after such a long journey gave me that glimmer of hope, that "I can get there from here, if I just try" feeling. It was the sign from God I had prayed for over and over, and I wasn't gonna pass on it. Now, I saw that article on a Wednesday I think. I didn't start right away because I had a trip to Texas for a funeral and knew that it wouldn't be the best time to do that. But I marinated in the idea of starting a blog all weekend until Sunday night when we got home. I did it, I went for it! I started my blog that night and started to count calories for real the next morning. I have not looked back since and I can honestly say, I believe God has been a big part of keeping me on my path. He has given me the countenance and wisdom and want to that I asked for and I plan on putting it to good use!

I am a witness to the great things God can do if you ask. I hope you are too. So before I got to bed tonight, I am gonna pray. I am gonna pray for all the folks out there who are lost and want to be found, who don't know how easy it is if you just let it be. I am gonna pray that they too stumble upon Sean Anderson's Blog and get the much needed shove in the right direction I got from it.

5 comments:

  1. Congratulations on this blog and on your weight loss!

    I loved this sentence of yours-"I am a witness to the great things God can do if you ask." I am a practicing Muslim woman, but I absolutely share that same sentiment.
    Wishing you all the best!

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  2. Shane, I am a Christian also and had a similar experience to yours with this whole weight loss thing. Different set of circumstances but similar in that I had prayed for months about my struggles and had an "ahaa" moment which led me to Weight Watchers, much like you were led to Sean's story.
    Thank you for sharing your story.

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  3. What a wonderful story of how you got started on this journey, Shane! And to be honest, I think that it's going to be a wonderful motivational speech that will wow faith-based audiences, as well. Won't you consider crafting that speech a bit, and giving to your congregation some Sunday? It would be a wonderful way to "pay it forwards" and help inspire other people to allow their faith to play a role in setting priorities in their life and get healthy for all the RIGHT reasons....

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  4. Shane,

    My story is practically a carbon copy of yours. I'm a Christian also, happened upon the AOL article on Sean, through my Yahoo home page. I don't use AOL, either. I read his story and was totally inspired. It gave me hope that if he could come so far, so could I. A lot of time people who have a substantial amount of weight to lose think there's no hope. Sean's life shows you differently.
    The only difference is I haven't really started a blog of my own. But I feel the Holy Spirit calling me to do so, so I'm going to work on it. I know it's not for the sake of the blog, it's what having that blog will do for me.
    Keep up the good work! And how wonderful Kathy is helping you so much along the way. It's all a process. God Bless!

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  5. Shane-


    I think for so many of us the Blog world is the community we all need to help us on this journey. God as our partner we can do it. And the fellowship of this community helps us all so much. Keep the faith! I am not where I want to be but I am not where I used to be- I am on my way and so are you!!!

    Bridget

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