Losing It For The Family

Losing It For The Family

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Day 108 Happpy Halloween!!

Happy Halloween folks!! The Trick or Treating is over with for the evening and I am satisfied with only having had a small candy bar and some Hot Tamales. I just did my calories and I did not break 1800!!That has become my outside limit for the weekends and it seems to be working out for me. I am going to brag a little. I got a wild hair yesterday to try to walk 5 miles straight through today. I am debating about doing it that way for the break at Thangksgiving, so I wanted to see how hard it would be. I am not sure I could do the whole thing at once on all four days, but I bet I could for two days in a row! I had no idea that we were also going to be walking to trick or treat tonight, and I wound up getting about a mile more in for that, so for the week, I am up to 22 1/2 miles for the week. I think that is a pretty good base number to start off with and build on. I also stayed busy with housework today. I did I think 7 loads of laundry, two loads of dishes and put all of both away when they were done. I got the a/c units out of the windows today too. I am now fighting off sleep like there will be no tomorrow, so I am going to close this out and say good night to all and hope we all did smart things when it comes to our Halloween decisions.

Day 107 Replacing One Addiction With Another

Good Saturday evening folks. I am a tuckered out fella today. I got my day started early. I woke up at 5, got my eyes good and open and started a loooooong day. I got started with three miles on the treadmill at 3.8 mph and a two incline. I got a good sweat on and am glad I am liking the treadmill walking considering the mornings are getting cold here....brrrr! So I quickly got some breakfast cooked and showered so I could go get Lauren and Kathy around at the lock in and meet Lauren's cheer squad at the school at 9:10. We made it just in time and the bus headed out shortly after. We drove to Greenwood, a town the county over about 40 minutes away. We lost our game but the girls did a heck of a job cheering!! One of our good friends was Lauren's coach and we hope she is again next year. After leaving the game, we went to JC Penney's and bought Lauren a kick butt coat for 60% off! It really was a great trip to the mall and I never say that. We came home for a little bit so the girls could take a quick nap since they had stayed up most the night yammering at the lock in. I took that opportunity to tack on two more miles to my total for the day. When I got back, Lauren asked me to go outside with her and practice her basketball passes and stuff so I went out and we messed around for a half hour or so. We came in and got all gussied up for the downtown Main Street Trick or Treat. I packed us a picnic lunch and we met our good friends out on the little ampitheater park on Main Street and had a good time visiting and eating. Finally we went on to the candy getting. I went last year and it was a blast, with some lines but at the end of each line was chocolate bars usually. Tonight, the lines were loooooooong and you got gum?!?!? So we left somewhat disappointed. Everybody came back to my house and we all visited and had a good time. The kids of course ran in and out and acted fools, and that is my favorite part of our get togethers. I love mah peeps!

I did great in the face of treats. I wound up eating two squares off a chocolate bar and some sort of tootsie roll like thing that tasted like grape. That was it. Well I take that back. I did have a popcorn ball right before we went to JC Penney because I did not know we would be at Lauren's game so long and had not brought some food with me and I was starving. We have been working on our budgeting and one thing that got the kibosh was eating out, so going somewhere for a quick salad was out, and the coach had given the girls each a popcorn ball after cheering. It was all I had and I was getting light headed, so I did eat it, but it was out of necessity and not weakness. I was shocked to find it only had 100 calories. It still made my mouth taste weird and sugary. I don't eat a lot of sugar and it is weird when I do how my mouth feels all yuck!

I think I am going to try to get 5 miles walking in again tomorrow. It has literally become a habit. In fact, I would go so far as to say it has replaced mindless eating as a habit. In thinking about this during my second walk to get two more miles, I started thinking how my life has become a series of switching one habit for another. For example, I spent my life working in factories and not really getting ahead in life, even though I got paid well, I wasn't going anywhere quick. Then I headed off to college at the age of 34 and have done well for myself getting ahead, even if no more so financially, but I have prospects now. I went from being a lonely single guy that often longed for something to do each weekend, to a husband and stepfather who sometimes wonders when his next opportunity to sit and chill is going to be. And most recently, I have changed from the guy who just is going to eat, drink and be merry, to the guy who sees what all that is going to do to his life expectancy and now has traded out all that for getting healthier. I no longer spend every minute I can behind this computer screen or in front of the TV, I literally map my days around when can I get another walk in. I no longer try to figure out what my next meal is ( at least not obsessively like in the past, I do plan ahead, but for practical purposes, not selfish)but now I track each calorie and make the best choices possible for a mixture of quality calories with an allowance for foods I enjoy added in. I make conscious decisions to get myself and keep myself healthy for my family, to prolong my time with them. I am ashamed to say this, but once upon a time, I rationalized my overeating behavior and the reason I said I wasn't going to do anything about it was that I wasn't having that great of a time here on earth anyway, might as well enjoy it and move on to the after life as soon as possible. I have only told a few people that, but it is a true story and one I am glad is not longer true!!!

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Day 106 I Have Discovered A New Trigger and Hot 100 Update

Hey guys. As the title suggests, I have learned one more trigger I have to learn how to combat, although I rarely ever deal with it. Kathy and Lauren are gone tonight, at at a lock in for the Girl Scouts for the night. I know I often think of how nice it would be if I had a night all alone for me to just chill and watch tube. It is not as great as it sounds. So, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up in the middle of my movie. For some reason, even though I was at 1400 calories for the night, I decided I needed to have a bowl of cereal. I had one. Not a big one, but then I sat there thinking why did I do that? I analyzed for a minute and came to grips with the fact that just like when I was single and eating everything in sight, the loneliness set me off. It was not a huge transgression, I know that, but still it is something that needs to be acknowledged and cut off at the knees. I think that is the most valuable aspect of blogging and sharing your journey with people who get this journey and have dealt with all the things I have dealt with and do deal with on a daily basis. Before this, I would have easily just stuffed this transgression down, acted like it didn't happen, then have another slip and another and another and then would begin the spiral until I was just back to me. I think you gain power by acknowledging and actively fighting those issues that have kept you from losing weight and getting healthier. By stuffing those issues down, you are feeding them by fearing them. ONce you are in control, once the problem is brought to the forefront to be put on trial, it is found guilty and sentenced to life or execution. So I now know that if my family is going to leave me alone, I have to be on guard, I have to put up that curtain. But in the same sense as all this, the rest of my day was fine, I did not overindulge at any other time, so bowl of cereal is not going to defeat me. I just needed to recognize publicly and loudly the issue of eating out of loneliness.

Ok, on to my Hot 100 Update. Still cruising right along. I will weigh on this coming Friday and I feel as though I will probably have met my get to 240 goal and at that time will change it to 230. I have not made any progress on getting my 5k time down as my ankles have been giving me trouble, so I am going to edit that one to read I am going to try to get 18 miles a week walked or more if possible, but given my schedule, that is a realistic number. I have not had any white bread as planned and my veggie and fruit eating have been steadily improved as hoped for. I am getting at least 5 servings a day! I have not gone to check on Hot 100 progress reports today, but I hope to see some good one folks!!

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Day 105 Five Miles Is A Start. and Three Things Thursday

I woke up with a mission today. I was going to get five miles of walking in to see how it would settle with my tired legs. I am going to be walking five miles a day on Thanksgiving break ad I wanted to see how well that was going to go. I need some work folks. I got 2 1/2 miles this morning and another 2 1/2 miles at lunch. I have been going hard in the morning all week and like I said, I raced with Lauren yesterday too. So as I type this, I am sore and stiff as hell! Looks like some work to be done between now and then!

One of the things I love about my weight loss so far is that there are so many physical things I can do now that I couldn't before. One of my favorite is that now rather than being "pinned in" behind my steering wheel when I am in my truck, I am able to move around enough to change my shoes in there when I go to Wal Mart in the morning and for my walks at the track too. I love it! When I stand up from my chair, it is no longer an effort. I feel so light and strong when I stand up, not tired and heavy. I also can walk a mile at a standard track in less than 16 minutes now! So, for Three Things Thursday, I want you to tell me three physical tasks you can now do or you can do easier than before you started this journey. Have a great day ya'll!!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Day 104 Probably Too Competitive

Hey guys. I may have a problem. I may be too competitive. Tonight I came home and Kathy had not started supper yet, so I told her I was going to go for a walk for a couple of miles. I got a mile in and then Lauren wanted to go on my next lap, so I invited her along. About a 1/4 of a lap in, she decides she can walk faster than me, so I prove her wrong. She tries doing a half run to try to beat me, so I show her she can't again. So she says "I KNOW I can run faster than you!" So I say go for it. We had started up the hill I talk about all the time and so when we took off and I started to beat her, she claimed that it was because it was up hill. So she then tried to ambush me most of the way up the hill and I still beat her, so she then claimed she had a cramp because she had already ran. So we go on around to the flat part of my block which goes in front of my house, and she once again tries to outrun me! I once again out sprinted her and beat her to the door! It was pretty funny, but now I am sore! My abs are killing me! But all I am taking from this, I outran my 9 year old! haha.

I also think my POS Wal Mart high tops have been doing a poor job of taking care of my feet when I walk. I put on my Skechers for walking today and even though they are not high tops, they seemed to work a lot better for my walking this morning at Wal Mart. I am wondering if my ankles could be hurting because of those crappy shoes! I will be hacked if I wasted twenty bucks and have slacked off on running for having bought the damn shoes!

Day 103 Self Fulfilling Prophecies

I had an interesting IM conversation with a friend today. Pam and I used to work together at my old law firm and I came to know and love Pam dearly. I had just begun my journey like two weeks before I departed the old firm. Pam had gotten caught up in my whirlwind and decided she too wanted to get fit and eat better, so she started doing a modified version of I want to say the flat belly diet. So during our IM conversation yesterday, Pam conceded our competition to me saying I win. I asked her why she would say that and she said I cheated on my diet. I said so, I had a bad Saturday and I am right back on track. She replied with I will probably cheat tomorrow to. I have been cheating a lot. So I called her out on a self fulfilling prophecy. So as I was driving home last night, I was thinking how that term is generally used with a negative connotation. But here is the thing. I am about to be the benefactor of a self fulfilling prophecy. Knowing that Thanksgiving is just right around the corner and knowing that my new November 30 goal is important to me, I came up with a plan. I am going to not only limit myself to 500 calories extra on Turkey Day, but I am going to take those 4 days off work and use them to over exercise to the tune of making myself get 20 miles walked those four days. Then it dawned on me that this will be a self fulfilling prophecy, only one that is good. I guess that is all a fancy way to say that planning is key, and planning well is the key to success. If you don't foresee a problem and make a plan, such as when I saw Thanksgiving as a hurdle in my quest for 230 by November 30 and decided how to handle that, then you are leaving yourself open to creating a situation in which you are prone to making mistakes. And I sometimes wonder if people like my friend like that opening. If it isn't built in on purpose, to allow them to fail. Have ya'll ever had that happen? I am positive I have done it subconsciously. I would bet my house on it. I have 'dieted' a lot in my years but somehow always came off for various reasons. I don't recall specifics, but I am betting I created situations that enabled me to slip and stay off the wagon. Well no more! I am a wagon riding fool, and good luck getting me off of it!!

Monday, October 25, 2010

Day 102 The Shane Exrress Is Back On Track

Since some of my blogger friends kinda expressed subtly that my Saturday transgression worried them, I want to say this. THE SHANE EXPRESS IS BACK ON TRACK!! I have had the most wonderful two days the last couple of days. I have been dead on on eating and my taking a day to rest my legs paid off. I now have fresh legs for the first time in a really long time! I was zooming around Wal Mart this morning like a man possessed! It was great to have a little something in my step today. I had been fighting fatigue I think. I am addicted to walking, but I am not in the shape to be doing the miles I have been apparently. I won't stop trying mind you, but I am going to try to be more mindful to my legs from now on. Probably not really but it sounds good. I am actually already trying to figure out how many miles I can get in tomorrow. It is looking like 4 or 5 optimistically. I need those miles dang it!

I got my old fried Growly McStomach back today and it settled my nerves to have him around. I like him, makes me feel good about me. I do like to tease him with like 6 peanuts or almonds when he gets to talking. It makes me smile when he shuts up for that little bit of food. I am still in awe of the fact that tonight, my total calories for the day was 1380 and I used to do that for a meal usually!! And I ain't starving, so how was it that was before? I will never get Pre Journey Shane. He was an odd duck.

I have had to come to terms with something over the last few days. I don't think I am going to get to be the runner I know I can be. My ankles are grown in wrong and it actually caused me a great deal of grief a few years back before I got to a foot doctor and they got me orhtotics for my shoes. I can walk comfortably now, but the doctor warned me to not try to run anymore. I failed at that, but because I so love running. WEll my ankles have been hurting pretty bad here lately and that is without running much, so I am going to try to maybe pull some more weight off me and try again in a few more pounds to see if the ankles may feel better with added muscles and lower body weight.

Oh, and I have a new personal goal. I want to be 230 pounds by the end of November. I am at 242 right now, so I think it is doable. I have decided that I will not have any more days like Saturday, I will keep putting together high mileage days of walking, and I will be extra careful to not eat out of control on Thanksgiving. I think I am in good shape because even if I allow the extra 500 for the day I am thinking about, I have four days off that are likely going to be days I use to get a ton o' walking in!! I wouldn't doubt I will put up 20 miles that weekend! I may start tracking my miles on here somehow just so I can see it in black and white. Ok folks, old man is ready for some slee.......zzzzzzzzzz.

Day 101 Not Very Interesting

Day 101 was much less active than Day 100, and not sure if I liked it or not. I had a ton o' school work to do and the girls had Girl Scout stuff to do out of the house, so I took advantage and just did homework the whole time they were gone. I also made a very difficult decision. I chose to do no exercise today. I am so sore and stiff and my body and feet are crying out for rest. I decided to take the day off today and get my homework done and just rest generally. It was ok while I was doing the homework, but once I was done, my feet were itching for a walk! I seriously had to talk myself out of it. I will be glad to get my walk in tomorrow morning to get rid of this itch!

Today was back to normal on my eating. I came in at 1610 on calories and had zero cravings. And I did not have the usual hunger I get on Sundays here lately, so that was a nice change I think. I kinda missed it truth be told. I don't know if you can be addicted to hunger, but if you can, I guess I am. I have come to thrive on the slight rumble in my tummy I guess. I feel like i am successful if it is there. a security blanket I guess? Well I best finish my tv watching. I have Pretty Woman on and it is not bad show I guess. It is the only movie I find Julia Roberts honestly attractive in. She is a great actress but I don't get the hoopla about her looks generally.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Day 100 A Question Answered

So today is Day 100!!! I can't say I never imagined I would get here, cause that is not true. I felt on Day 1 and still feel today that this journey, this great trek that I have been on, was Divinely Inspired. I asked, He answered. It is really that simple folks. So I had a couple of minutes on hand this morning and I feel this was also Him talking to me, so I went back in my archives, not looking specifically for any post, but randomly decided to look at my Day 14 post. I was scrolling around looking for it and this passage from Day 13 caught my eye. I remember this day like it was yesterday and the thoughts just as clear as if they were a few minutes ago. I was fairly new to this and I had began to wonder, would food ever be an after thought? Would my menu always be cause for concern or worse even, fear? What follows is my thoughts from Day 13:

Herein lies my problem. I am honestly still hungry. Not starving, but hungry. I would say it is likely because I worked hard outside all day and my body is in a calorie deficit, but I don't want to eat. I don't want to open that door. In the past, I have always rationalized a "step off the path" for a day like today, where I got a great deal of physical activity and was low on my calorie count, so hey live a little. Go to the cook out, eat, you can get back on plan tomorrow. One thing I am determined to do is take the well known stories of my life, and change the endings. I am writing all new stories, ones with happy endings. Ones where I do fight the urges, ones where I succeed. Ones where food doesn't win. I do wonder though. And maybe Sean is the guy to ask this. Will there ever be a time when I won't THINK about food at all? I mean on the drive home, all I could think about was the fact I was hungry and that I didn't need to eat cause my bank was out. But even with that thought, I am still THINKING about food, even if it is to determine I am not going to eat it. Does that ever stop? Does food ever become ancillary to life? I don't know any other ending than failing, so I have to wonder, does winning mean not thinking about food? I realize you have to think about your choices, but does that having to think about not eating ever get beat out of you? I choose to believe it will. I know my attitudes now are so much different than they used to be towards food. I am only 13 days in and food has lost a great deal of control over me. I know that in the future, I expect that I will adapt the eat to live, not live to eat attitude. I look forward to it. It may be hard work , there may be bad days, but I will get there! As for now, still hungry, still thinking about NOT EATING! So I am filling up on water and fixing to go to bed. I almost fell prey to the "Shane's rationalization" bug a few minutes ago and I don't wanna do that! So I will chalk this day up to another test and say I believe I passed it. I am yawning my fool head off, so I better sign off here. Please, keep on inspiring me, and I will try to do the same for you!!!!

I can honestly say, I know the answer now. Yes, thinking about food does diminish greatly. I am not to the point that it is ALWAYS ancillary, but I can go for hours without a thought of it. I ain't at the destination, but I am on the tracks!

So all that is above this, I wrote on early Saturday morning. Now I have a P.S. to ad to it. I had an incredibly active day today and by 4 o'clock, I was famished. I am going to be completely honest, I know I went over calorie wise today. Not sure by how much, but I know I did. That being said, it wasn't a ton o' crap food that I went over with. And, it wasn't an emotional thing. I seriously made a conscious decision to open the gate a little and just let myself go from 4 o'clock on tonight. I ate some cajun peanuts out of the shell, some grapes, I had my dinner of grilled chicken breast and some spinach, my yogurt, I even sampled some spaghetti that Kathy made for her and Lauren, then my usual yogurt. Of all that I allowed myself today, the worse was a bowl of sweet cereal. Here is the thing. I am not the least bit scared that I opened a door. It was a conscious decision. Not a sneaking up on me thing, not a emotionally fueled binge, Heck I would hardly even really call it a binge, I had eaten around 645 calories up to that time, so I don't think I went well over my 1800 calorie limit, but I was seriously famished and just let myself get more fuel than usual on purpose.

You guys who follow me regularly, do you have any thoughts on this? I feel like I am a pretty strong person and this is in now way a danger to my future. But I would like an objective opinion or two from you guys. My focus doesn't feel compromised, in fact, my last thought before bed was won't happen again for at least two months there buddy. Do you guys think dropping your guard on occasions is a good idea, assuming you are strong enough to put it back up every time?

Ok guys, I want to ask you a favor. Go visit my new friend, Angela and give her some encouragement please. She has been at it for awhile but has no followers to encourage her and cheer her on. Pretty please go show her some blogger love. I bet she would appreciate it very much! and so would I. Thanks, ya'll are the best.
Posted by Shane G. at 7:24 PM

Friday, October 22, 2010

Day 99 Hot 100 Update, Weigh Day and a Math Problem For Everybody To Solve

Happy Friday everybody!!!! I know it is for me! I have been happy as a lark all day. I have had quite the busy morning. I woke up and weighed and I have lost 5 more pounds over the last two weeks!!! I am down to 242 and headed for the 230 decade quick! And now for your math problem. If you have 2 X's and you take 1 X away, how big is your new shirt size? Give up? It's a XL!!! I had one XL shirt I talked about awhile back and I could wear it then, but today I put it on and it was not tight at all!!! I decided to have that by my shirt today. Then after thinking on it awhile, I remembered it seemed to me that it was cut a little big as it is an athletic shirt. So I told Kathy that I wanted to go to the new thrift store in Fort Smith that is like a Wal Mart in their organization but has a wider selection. I wanted another XL to confirm my size change. I had to wait though because I was on a mission today. I got my law school application finished and mailed out today and then I took my transcript request for LSAC to the registrar's office for them to send it in to all the law schools! I am still patiently waiting on my score, but I wanted to get things going ASAP! Then I had to sit down and study for my sociology test today and I just had the dangdest time! So finally I get done and meet Kathy for lunch at Chick Fil A. Their char grilled chicken salad is awesome with some mustard on it! I got a great meal for like 240 calories! We headed down the road to the thrift shop and I began to peruse the shirts to find one I would like. I wound up looking at a basic Nike t shirt with a small swoosh on it. It is a darker red and I know Nike tends to cut their shirts a bit smaller actually. So I bought it and put it on when I got home...... turns out I am an XL!! Thank the Lord above for that thrift store, cause my wardrobe is gonna need some tuning up soon! I ain't rich but they aint expensive either!

And for the coup de gras, I have proof I am addicted to walking now. I took Lauren to school this morning as usual and since there was no fruit at the house and I have fruit for my morning snack, I decided to drop in to Wal Mart for fruit. I never ever never work out on Fridays. No weights, no walking, no anything. I give myself that one day to rest and heal up. Well I wasn't in the store 5 seconds when it just hit me, I was in shorts and tennis shoes, I was in Wal Mart, and blam, it was decided before I even could protest to myself. Off I set for my usual 8 laps at speed no less. I have a problem folks. Not a bad one, but a problem. I am staying pat on jogging a mile and a half tomorrow, so Sunday could be interesting!

Ok, I am all bubblied out so I will see ya'll later. Kathy, Lauren and I are doing Ghost Stories by the Bon Fire at the Arkansas River tonight and hanging with our Girl Scout Troop and friends. It will be a great night and we will have a blast I am sure of it!

crud I forgot to do my Hot 100 update. I am on pace for all of my goals. No white bread eaten, I am closing in on 240 and will probably have to aim for 230 instead on my weight, I have eaten the garden bare on vegetables, my 5k time is the only sufferer. I may have to let that one go eventually but not yet! So there ya have it. Steve, sorry I am kinda late once again!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Day 98 Three Things Thursday and a Potential Land Mine Disarmed

Howdy bloggers and bloggerettes! It is my Friday and I am in a pretty good mood. We had our ribbon cutting for the Chamber of Commerce at the office today. There was food involved and I did get some, but I damn sure did not go into PJS mode (pre-journey Shane for those unaware). I had 4 of the salami/creamcheese/olive rolls, and some hot dip on two crackers and then filled up on the green olives on the veggie tray. They was yummy folks! I wound up leaving work with a lot higher calorie count than usual, so I had a light supper of a pita with three slices of deli meat, a veggie burger, some yogurt and then I had my celery and peanut butter for my last snack. Oh and grapes too. I still slid in under 1500 for the day so I am happy.

Tomorrow is weigh day and I have reviewed my last two weeks in terms of diet and exercise. I ended two weeks ago at 247 and I am thinking I did good enough to possibly bust into the 239 range. I am waiting on pins and needles for tomorrow morning. If I didn't go into the 230's then so be it. I will next time!!

So for Three Things Thursday, I decided that I would go with something that I have been aware of the last three or four days. I know most of us are out to lose the belly, but mine is being stubborn, so I have turned to looking elsewhere for my reminders that I am being successful, even if I am not a flat belly yet! So I am asking that you list three things about your body, not including your belly in any way,that you have noticed significant change in. For example, I am trying to hold out on getting my wedding ring sized cause it virtually flops around on my finger. I have to be careful in the shower when I am shampooing or it will fall off. I have been famous for my hot dog rolls in the back of my neck for years! I have been told, those guys are starting to shrivel and wither away. I also have noticed how sexy my legs are looking lately! I have some very impressive thighs according to my wife and I see some veins popping out of my calves now, it is a beautiful sight! So let me enjoy some of your non belly body changes and we will all share the joy together!!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Day 97 Is There A Name For Walking Addiction?

I googled it but couldn't find out if there is a name for an addiction to walking. I seriously feel as though I may be getting there. I got two miles before work, two miles at lunch and was going to go for two miles after dinner but my hamstrings are telling me that they may well have had enough of all that! I have had sore hamstrings and butt muscles since the hike Saturday. I just can't sit down long enough to let them recover I guess. I take Fridays off, so that may help. I may just walk at 1/2 speed tomorrow morning instead of going all out. I got 5 miles in today and that should get me far enough ahead for a slow day right?

So I was thinking while doing my morning walking today and I suddenly recalled the first day of this journey and all the feelings I had. I was hopeful, I was scared, I was nervous, I was excited. My mind was going a million miles an hour and I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach that this blog thing, the tracking of calories, the open and honest reporting of the tangible and intangible factors in my dieting and exercising, this would be the formula that got me where I wanted to be health wise. I recall the first couple of days being a cross between exhilarating and scary. I remember being upset with myself for not getting the exercise part right away. Man those were the days. Not knowing what the future held. All things were possible. Now I am on track and I know how things are going to be. Wow, nice feeling.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Day 96 I Am A Tracker!!!!

So just a bit over three months in folks and there is one thing I have taken from this whole process so far. Tracking absolutely works (for me) and I have replaced my old addictions with this new addiction. Nothing goes in my gullet without being written down. I am really good at either finding calories or knowing about what they are. If I am in doubt, I over guesstimate it. I also have a much different definition of overeating now. I am shocked at how if I have one thing over what I am used to eating now, I feel like holy crap, I am out of control!! For example, we bought a cantaloupe the other day and Kathy cut it up for our picnic. We had a bowl of half of it left over, and I was having trouble getting to my calories AND I was still hungry, so I had some of the cantaloupe after my peanut butter and celery treat that signifies my eating is over for the evening. Well about a minute after eating maybe a cup of cut up cantaloupe, I was like, what the crap, what was I thinking? I am out of control!! After some really looking at it, I calmed down. I just find it fascinating that I went from eating 4 hot dogs AFTER SUPPER being a common occurrence to having a cup of cantaloupe freak me out. Oh goodness what kind of monster have I created!! haha.

So I need a ruling. I am waaaay active on the weekends now and I have been having a problem with starving on Sundays and Mondays for a month and a half or better now. I decided to combat it by letting myself get to 1800 calories on Sunday (more cantaloupe involved and yes another small freak out, as I have been staying under 1500 a lot lately!) Do ya'll think that is a good idea? does anyone else employ this method? I am gonna try it the next couple of weeks and see what the scale tells me. Speaking of which, I am excited about weigh day this week. I just know I will be down to 240 and that means that sometime in November, we are talking 230's baby! That will be one goal met in the Hot 100!!

OK, I gotta go see if the Rangers can get up 3-1 so I will see ya'll later!!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Day 95 Is That? I think It Is!!! Wrinkles On Shane's Face!!

Not feeling too talkative tonight. I am tarred (tired for those not from the south) and looking to get to bed soon. I do want to talk about something that was pointed out to me this weekend by Lauren. I apparently was getting old under my fat face, cause now I am showing some wrinkles around my eyes folks. Now I should probably be upset, but I am not. In fact, I would classify this as an NSV!! I have been ogling them for two days now and I have come to love them and what they represent. I am doing it folks. I am losing enough weight to allow my wrinkles to show up!! I thought about this for a good part of my walk at Wal Mart this morning. I love finding the small things like that and just enjoying them, cherishing them and dreaming of more NSVs to come!!

The soreness from this weekend was running deep this morning. I decided that I would not go full speed at Wal Mart for my walk this morning but 3/4 speed to let the blood get to the muscles and stretch them out. It seems to have worked, my legs are not as sore now. Tomorrow it is back to the program for me!!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Day 94 Knowledge Is Power

Guys, I have done a little of everything today! I started my day with some coffee and internet time, moved on to dishwashing and kitchen cleaning, a little breakfast cooking for me, a three mile walk, a visit with my Momma, a little more dishwashing, some breakfast cooking for Kathy, some Diversity in the Workplace homework, a solo trip to Lowe's for boards to fix the gate on the privacy fence, cooking lunch for me an Kathy both, mendindg the gate on the privacy fence, mending the electric fence, another mile walk (I wanted to have ten for the weekend), and then some Cowboys Football watching (booooooo) and then I got to finish Iron Man 2 without falling asleep. Aaaaaah, a pretty good day, no?

So, I am sure we have all heard the the saying "knowledge is power" before, haven't we? Yeah, it has never been more evident than ever to me that this is true than it is to me now that I have started to make conscious decisions on my food and exercise choices. I am not pleading total ignorance is my reason for my largeness now, I am just saying that compared to what I know now, I knew very little before. I am not just aware of calories now but glycemic indexes, fat contents, carb contents. I know how to prepare food that is good for me now, rather than a stop at the drive through or the gas station. I know that I don't NEED a gallon of soda a day. Heck I don't NEED any soda, but I do have two a week. I know that water consumption is at least very important if not the key to weight loss. I know that if I eat fewer calories, and exercise more, then I create a calorie deficit for that day, and I lose weight. I know that if I eat often enough, small snacks, then my metabolism will not go into starvation mode. I know that if I will just get up and get started on that exercise, I will be rewarded by a better attitude and a great self image. I know that I want to help others to find all these things out, because knowledge is power, but spreading knowledge is a form of grace, which God wants us all to have. I have considered the idea of approaching the editor of my local paper to see if I may be able to begin a weekly column in his paper telling people about my journey, the things I have learned, the things I have done, the things I have experienced. I would love to get some local folks here on the bandwagon and perhaps provide a little spark and enthusiasm for their beginning. What do ya'll think?

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Day 93 Dang 5k Goal!

I am aggravated. I did not knock any time off my 5k this week. I suck. I guess the one bright spot is that I did jog a mile and a quarter straight, but even at that I wanted to get to a mile and a half, so I fell shy. I gotta work on that.

I had the greatest day. I got up and got my 5k in and it was as described above. I did use my treadmill this morning for it. That was kinda nice since it was FREEZING outside!! Then I had to get the girls up so we could get Lauren to her daddy's house this morning for his weekend. Then Kathy and I went to a thrift shop that is apparently a chain, but they are so frikkin cheap for the good stuff, it ain't funny! I got an awesome office shirt for 6 buck I think. Then the dreaded Wal Mart trip. I was extra cranky for it today since we had been gone past both my snack time and my lunch time when we got there! I had a banana on the way out, and then I grilled tilapia and a squash for each of us. Then Kathy made us some chicken salad and off we went to go to Devil's Den and hike up the Yellow Rock Trail. It is a nice hike with a ton of gorgeous views, awesome rock formations, and an overlook is the pay off at the end of the trail. We hiked up a mile and a half all up hill, then all the way back down the hill for another mile and a half. Here is the only picture I have right now as Kathy hasn't downloaded the rest yet:

This picture doesn't do the real view justice, but it is the best I have to offer. It is a cell phone pic, so keep that in mind.

So all in all I have 6 miles of good exercise in for the day and the calories, are spot on! I even splurged a few for a Braum's fat free yogurt cup and loved it!!

Kathy and I had a blast together today on the hike, then we watched 'The Crazies' tonight. It was a pretty good movie. I think that bed time is nigh though. I am a tired man!! Ya'll have a great one!!

Day 92 Hot 100 Udate and Backwards As Always!

The Hot 100 is still in full swing and I am cruising along so far. I am especially proud of my no white bread or white bread pretending to be wheat bread rule. I had a bit of a problem at first, but I am under control with it. I have done at least good and possibly even really good with the eat more vegetables goal. Kathy must have had that one on her mind before I even set it, because we have been eating the heck out of them for supper lately! I am really getting a taste for fresh veggies as opposed to canned veggies too. MMM MMM!! My get to 240 pounds goal is looking like it may get amended to get to 230 possibly. It will depend on the next weigh in. I am still a work on progress on the 5k time being under 40 minutes. I am going to try working on that in the morning or maybe on Sunday morning. Which leads me to the Backwards as Always part of the title. I have lived my life backwards it seems, always doing the things I should have done early on, I do them later in life. So it is fitting that I took my usual Friday off from working out, only to be sore by that afternoon! Leave it to me to get sore on my day off of working out! So depending on my status tomorrow morning, I may switch Saturday to my just finish the 5k and jog on Sunday.

I had a great Friday night ya'll. We went to the Van Buren High School Homecoming game tonight with some friends and all our girls. It is great to have a big group to hang out with and watch football. And I get as much of a kick from watching Lauren, Maddie, Allison, Amanda and all the other girls all thinking they are big girls cause we let them go down and hang out by the fence and socialize with all their friends from school as I do watching the game. I am hoarse this morning cause our Pointers had a great game last night. I saw the prettiest blocked punt and return of the block for a touch down and I got so excited and wished we had replay at the stadium so we could see it again! Life has been good to me and I thank Him for blessing me so much. My God is an awesome God indeed!! I love that song so much because I feel that way so often! I have said it time and again, I know it was him who put Sean Anderson's blog in my path, made me actually click on a link, which I NEVER do in a news story, and gave me the motivation in my heart to get started on this journey I prayed for for so long! I can do all things through Christ!

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Day 91 New Type of Rationalizations and Three Things Thursday

Hey guys and gals! I am in a good mood once again! I have had a heck of a day today and I love my life! No big happenings, it was just a good day in general. I was dead on with food, exercise, work, you name it. So my exercise was my main source of happiness today. I had a great weight workout this morning. I got the most push ups at one time I have in quite some time, I did some crunches too and it didn't kill me like it did last week. I headed out to Wal Mart for my walking and I got eight hard laps in and felt so good afterwards that if I had time, I would have done another eight! At lunch, I was feeling pretty perky and had no tasks to complete at lunch, so I hopped over to the track and caught me another mile and half just to be getting more in. I didn't go hard, but I didn't stroll either. It was basically me going as hard as I comfortably could. And then after I got home, I talked Kathy into a walk with me. She could only go a half mile with me then had to leave, so I was on my own for the other half mile I had planned. Well, when I was on that lap, I was adding up how many miles I had walked today and it came to me that I had done 4 1/2 miles total. Well it didn't set well with me, so I decided that I was going to do another lap to make it a full 5 for the day!! I was home and thinking about it and check this out. Today, I made an excuse to do AN EXTRA LAP! 4 months ago, I was making excuses to NOT DO ANY LAPS! I made all sorts of excuses and came up with all sorts of rationalizations to not work out at all, to not change my eating habits, to not do anything that would benefit my health and well being for the long run. "I am too busy to add a diet into things I am doing", "my knee just keeps on hurting when I try to do laps around the block", "I can't start today, I always have started diets on Mondays". Yeah I had the reason to not get going on this journey before. I could talk myself out of doing what I knew needed to be done with any number of excuses. Three months later, I am making excuses still! But this time, these are the good excuses!! I should do one more lap because I don't want to have a half mile, I am not gonna eat my snack so I can stay below 1400 calories today, I am gonna do (insert weight training exercise) here so I can rest my (insert muscle group I probably worked too hard) but not lose my momentum in workouts. These are my new excuses. I think they will serve me much better than my old ones.

So, for Three Things Thursday, tell me what excuses and rationalizations that you used before your journey to keep you fat and out of shape instead of happy, active and on the road to weight loss and health? Leave them in the comments please!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Day 90 What Do I See There?

So until 1 minute ago, I did not realize that it was day 90 today!! Cool.

I had the most delicious dinner tonight and it was so low cal! Kathy made a soup out of cabbage, stewed tomatoes, lima beans and corn all cooked in chicken stock. It was great!!! I am a little gassy, but I won't tell if ya'll don't! I love my wife so much!!

So this morning I was working out as usual, and it was curls day. I started noticing something while I was lifting. My biceps are really really showing up good! I started looking around and I have a lot of lines looking good on me. I got separation in my biceps, my triceps, my shoulders, my thighs are monstrous, my calves are well defined, I still don't really have a butt, and I even can see where my fat and my fit belly are separated and how skinny I will be when my toning and shrinking is done!! I am utterly excited and my motivation is at an all time high!!

Not about weight loss but still pretty exciting! Cheryl, my boss, well she is the best boss ever. I got a sizable raise today!!! like a $1.50 an hour kind of raise!! wooo hooo! I love my job!!!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Day 89 I Carried It Well? C'mon!!

Greetings and salutations my good blogging friends. I am in an infinitely better spot today than I was for last night's post. I was downright grumpy last night. I got a little ahead in the game today and I have to say, it is nice. My class got canceled, so the test I was going to stay up late drinking coffee to take got taken while at school for the class that got canceled. So I came home to find that Kathy had made a healthier version of Sheppard's pie because she loves me so much!! It was yummy, but even the healthy version is a calorie trap. I got myself a small bowl out and got enough to fill it about 3/4 full and that was my allotment of Sheppard's pie. I have to admit, I still want bigger portions of stuff, like tonight, I did want more than I got, but I think the important thing is that I keep on wanting but not getting. I assume that eventually, the common sense side of me will take over, and what is left over of PJS will just eventually give up the wanting more and stroll away. I love that it is not an internal struggle with a pre-determined outcome any longer, I know that. I couldn't count the amount of times I would try to talk myself out of this or that food, knowing full well I lost the battle before I ever started fighting. It is nice to be winning these days.

So I have to wonder, something. How may of you were ever told or told yourselves this outrageous falsity during our heaviest days: "you carry it really well". I was both told that, and told myself that on many occasions. So, I am going through some hard copy pictures that Kathy had printed off of our vacation in June of this year, and ummm I found this:

Carrying that well aren't I? So while I was back at Kathy's computer stealing this from her, I came across another picture that shows me "carrying it well" here:

I think I may have put this one on  here before, but still, check that out. So tell me that wasn't some hellacious rationalization going on! One of my co-workers heard one of my stories today and when I was done telling her the whole thing and explaining my motivation, she said Shane, you are in the right business with logic like yours! I laughed pretty hard.

Well those are the bleeecch pics that show how we can lie to ourselves and be lied to by our friends and family. I honestly thought "yeah I am fat, but I carry it well" on a regular basis. So this is a picture of me at 255, which was  few pounds ago but it is the most recent I have:

and a side angle too:

Am I a work on progress? Yes I am , but I am a great deal down the road from where I started on July 17, 2010 and I have a lot of people to thank for it, yourselves included. Thanks so much bloggy friends for giving me a forum to be me, to explore being me, to get support and advice and all the things that are so important when you are trying to lose weight. Thanks to my family and friends also. I have a great support system and I appreciate it so much. but please, don't lie to me anymore!!  haha.

Good night friends!!

Monday, October 11, 2010

Day 88 A Day Late is Better Than Never Right?

I saw a whole bunch of Top Ten lists yesterday in honor of the 10/10/10 phenomena. I did not do one, but feel so compelled to do one since so many were inspirational. Well there is that an the fact that some jack ass in my class kept talking until we were over 20 minutes late getting out, and it is a class that gets out at 8:05 p.m. So I am too tired right now to be too awful yippity skippity or introspective. This is much easier to do. So my top ten list of things I am thankful for is as follows:

1. First and foremost, my beautiful wife Kathy. She is my rock, she is my inspiration, and she is the light of my life. Without her, I would have copped out of this school thing long ago, I promise.

2. Lauren McGill, my step daughter. Lauren is the greatest daughter I could ask for, even when she is a pain! She helps keep me young at heart by playing and acting silly with me. I have an excuse to see cartoon movies now that I have her too!

3. Fran Warren, my mother. She has put all this great ball of chaos I call my life in motion. Without her, I could have never started school, or bought this house, or be running for office, or any of the things that make my life crazy and wonderful as it is.

4. This blog. This has been a great tool for my weight loss journey. I have made some great friends on here, gotten some great support, and have found myself being good because I would have to tell ya'll I was bad if I was, and I don't like to be embarassed.

5. University of Arkansas Fort Smith. The University has opened up so many great opportunities for me. Because it is local and affordable, I am getting the education I always kicked myself for not getting, and without it, I would not be on the path I am today towards a career as a lawyer. I have also met many great friends while there and will cherish them for life.

6. The tremendous health benefits of this weight loss. I just feel so much better, and things are so much easier to do now. I love it!!

7. My "home gym". I have a cornucopia collection of weights and benches and stationary bikes and a treadmill. All these things have helped me tremendously in some form or another make my journey a little better.

8. This laptop computer. It is my portal to the world and a valuable tool. I get to talk to some pretty amazing people, learn some pretty amazing things, and get some pretty boring work done on this bad boy!!

9. My dogs. I get so much joy out of my babies! They all have great personalities, are all a hoot in some way shape or form, and they have the unconditional love for me I have for them.

10. Kathy and my king size bed. We had a queen for a year or so after we got married and Kathy is a bed hog galore! I had about a square foot of the bed for me, the rest was hers! Now that we have our king bed, I get a lot more and a lot better sleep!

So there you have it, these are the things that make my life what it is, a joy to live!!

Kenz, sorry but FMFM is off the docket for today, I am tired as hell! I will try to do better next Monday I promise!!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Day 87 Walk vs. Run and Does Anyone Else Feel Really Powerful After a Workout?

So I have seen a couple of posts the last few days about walking vs. running. Christina had her husband tell her that walking is not really exercise. Tony B. said that he read an article that said that you get the same benefits from walking as running, except that you get a bit more cardio work from jogging. I guess that I am good either way since I do both! But seriously, I disagree wholeheartedly with Christina's husband. I define exercise as any activity that you do with the intention of getting in better shape and losing weight. So, in relation to let's say you sitting behind your computer screen all day and night, going for a walk to get in shape, yeah that is exercise.

So today's 5k was not a record time, buuuuut, heh heh, I did set another record. I wanted to see if I could jog a whole mile at once today, one of the reasons the 5k was not a record time, and I did!!! It was a 12 minute mile!! I am pretty psyched about that too! I actually had the legs to go another half mile but the lungs just weren't there. So I may start jogging a mile on Wednesday nights just to get my lungs in better shape and start trying to get a mile and a half jogging on the weekends for now. Anybody have any thoughts on this? I know that I am sore as hell already so tomorrow may be bad for me!

I am curious if I am a weirdo, and you guys will likely be the only ones to be honest with me and even get what I am talking about too. I felt all puffy chested and powerful today, once I recovered from my exhaustion of jogging. I do that a lot. I just feel all proud and ready for anything that may come my way. I would pity the man who picked a fight with me after a jog! I also have really been cognizant of my weight loss and muscle gain the last couple of days. I got in the car with Kathy to go visit the Hunter's for football today and I noticed that I can see my seatbelt strap that goes across my lap now!!

And I got a blog award today from both Tony and birchgirl. I do appreciate them guys but I am too tired and lazy tonight to do the stuff for them. I definitely wanted to say thank you guys. Birchgirl, thanks so much for the nice things you said about me. That seriously means a lot to me to know you think well of me. Tony, keep it up brother, you are finding a groove and once you settle in, it is gravy dude.

Ya'll have a great rest of the evening and I will see what I can do about doing the same!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Day 86 LSAT OVER!! Hoping for a Record Tomorrow Too

Thank God that is over! I took the LSAT today and I did a lot of praying and asking God for wisdom and courage. I have a really good feeling about my score! I think between my prayers and all the others, I am good! Not as good as God mind you, but good.

I had a weird eating day today. I had some of my usual stuff for breakfast, two egg two turkey bacons, then I had a fiber bar before going in for the test. Then for break, I ate turkey jerky. I had another fiber bar for the drive home. I was pretty hungry when I got back, so I did the pita/lunch meat sandwich real quick. Then Kathy fixed us some turkey breast, corn and cranberry sauce and she made her some stuffing. I refused it because of my bread thing. I felt bad but she knows I ain't playing on that front. Then Kathy and I went for a mile and a half walk together and at one point, we were playing around and decided to get in a foot race! It was short lived, but it was funny!

Tomorrow I am doing my jogging 5k and hope to get a record once again this week! I am hoping to jog for a full mile too! That should be fun!!

Ok, Shrek is getting to the good part so gotta go!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Day 85 Weigh Day and It Rears Its Ugly Head - Hot 100 Update

It is weigh day baby!! And here is the good news for today. I am down 8 more pounds to 247 and for those scoring at home, well that equals 50 pounds lost!!!!! It is mind numbing to imagine that in less than three months, I have dropped 50 pounds. I would have never thought I would be able to do that, not in a million years. So cheers After Journey Shane. Well done sir.

So true to form, I have to follow the good new with some what I would say is maybe bad news, but a weird kind of bad. I am stressed, stressed, stressed over the LSAT. I was cruising along today, eating was on course. Then after supper, I had a mini melt down of sorts. I am not sure if a) eating yogurt, celery and peanut butter, 5 turkey pepperonis, and a fiber bar and b) I am only a few calories over the 1800 limit I have set is really considered a mini melt down. Now the fact it is emotional eating should be a point for concern, but I am done for the night and the damage, while up front and center on my radar, is minimal. I think it is just a matter of how do I handle the days after this.

I made a discovery tonight. Kathy can cook a dish called ratatouille and it is yummy!! We had turkey brats with it for a great supper, followed by my mini melt down. After that, I went into war preparation mode. I packed the ziplock back I am allowed to bring to the LSAT with the stuff I am allowed to bring, then printed off my ticket I have to bring to the test, then the most important part, I loaded my MP3 with my 'get pumped' music to listen to on the way up to get myself in battle mode before the test. I am ready and raring to get this test taken, and am praying to God for wisdom and courage. Think of me tomorrow guys.

And for the Hot 100 update: I am on goal all the way around! My vegetable intake, thru the roof!! I have had salads full of veggies 4 days this week, I had ratatouille for supper tonight, I have celery and peanut butter every night. I have not had any white bread per my amended bread goal, in fact the only bread I have ever is the pita bread I have for my lunch and it is flax seed, whole wheat and I want to say barley or something. I did knock my 5k down to 43 minutes 30 seconds last week and am hoping to knock it down again this week. And as mentioned above, I am down to 247 lbs now! So Hot 100 has been great to me so far!! Come on Hotties, let's rock these last 83 days.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Day 84 Three Things Thursday and What really Was the Problem?

So Sean's last post discussed how someone had asked him how he spent so long on his posts when he blogs. Sean replied that he determined that his blog was not an "I ate this, I weigh this much now and I can wear these pants" blog, but one of introspection and discovery. I set out with that goal in mind after reading Sean's blog. I was going to psychoanalyze myself and get to the bottom of all this madness. And I think I had it going on in the beginning. I now have thought about this for about 3 days and I have come up to a conclusion that is not to flattering for me, but I believe it is the truth. I would like to think so many deep, psychological things were going on that just derailed me in my life and that is the blame for all my woes. I now believe it was honest, through and through laziness and stupidity on my part that made my scale register "E" when I stepped on it. Not my emotions, not my past, not my fear of success, nothing. Just me being too lazy to do the right thing. That is why my introspection has been so sparse lately. It wasn't needed. My problem was not deep rooted, it was not buried down deep inside. My problem was shallow and transparent. I was frikkin' stupid. Period. I can't even plead ignorance. I knew full well what needed to be done to lose weight, I just was too lazy and hard headed to do it. So, yeah, that is me. Or more to the point, that is the old me!! I am on it and I have a bandwagon to get me to where I am going and keep me on the straight and narrow and accountable for my actions. So there is my introspection, I guess, sad as it may be. But PJS ain't here no more. It is AJS now! Onward we roll!

So as promised, I am going to start doing a Three Things Thursday. I thought long and hard to come up with this one. I just had trouble coming up with something for today. So here it is. Name three things that are healthy for you that you now eat that you didn't or wouldn't eat before you started this journey. As for me, that would be turkey bacon, the turkey version of bratwurst, and all these dang vegetables I am chowing down on nowadays!

So there you have it folks. Let's see some responses in the comments! Happy Friday Eve!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Day 83 A One Eighty That is Kinda Wierd, but Not Bad

Happy Hump Day!! I am ready for this week to come to its end. I have a lot of things going on and I need this Sunday to get my chill on since it is the first chance I will have between now and then. I don't think I have talked about it but I am taking the LSAT this weekend and I have to do some prep for it, then take my whole Saturday to take the test. Come Sunday, I am gonna be ready for a 5k!

Alon that same vein I have a weird story. I have been having some dead leg syndrome lately but I just push through and get my walks in. Well Tuesday, I seriously could not finish all 6 laps at full speed. I wound up letting up on laps 5 and 6. Then today, I was on lap 5 of 7 when I thought for sure my calf was gonna cramp up and i was gonna make a spectacle of myself right there! Now, the seemingly smart thing to do would be to take a day off, let the legs rest. So, why won't I? I did toy with the idea today, it made me a little anxious for some reason. I couldn't NOT walk. So one thing I have learned is that planning is a key for me. I think I am gonna plan a day off from walking. I may even take Saturday off for convenience puposes so that I can run my laps in Sunday's 5k. I am thinking of trying to jog a whole mile this Sunday just to see if it is possible for me.

I am gonna get off here and see about making it to bed for a good nights sleep. I am going to take precautions to be get ready for Saturday morning!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Day 82 I Am Gonna Say It......... My Man Boobs

I want to start off by assuring Christine that I have been great on my food. I just don't mention it alot because truth be told, I don't think about it like I used to and I eat healthy and proportion minded all the time so it is just in the background now. I have a very vanilla menu that has some wiggle in it, like I sometimes have one egg and two egg whites, or sometimes I have three turkey bacon slices for breakfast. I always have my pita and lunchmeat lunches, I always have almonds for my snack now, I usually always have 4 to 6 ounces of a lean meat at dinner, always one but usually two veggies, I eat yogurt after supper and celery and peanut butter for my late snack. It sounds blah, but alot of it is what I like and that is good for me right now. At some point, alternatives will find their way in, just like these used to be my alternatives. Again, eating just doesn't have the front and center on stage for me anymore so I don't talk a lot about it. So there you go Christine, I hope this calms your nerves... haha.

My thought for the blog this morning was that I have been looking in the mirror alot here lately. So the last couple of days, I thought it looked like I am gaining weight, because historically, I have watched my chest to belly ratio. The belly had been coming back to meet the chest slowly and that was how I could kinda visually mark my weight loss. Well for the last couple of days, it seemed to look like my belly was going away from my chest!!! I kinda got a little freaked out today over that and ruminated all day about it. I just came in from mowing the yard and I had taken my shirt off (don't swoon ladies, trust me, it ain't pretty) and sat down. As usual I opened my laptop on the table beside my chair and I leaned forward to read and it hit me, my chest to belly crease was gone!! Guys will prolly understand this concept better. My belly and chest used to form an over lap with each other that I could stick most of my finger in. It is gone!!I kept leaning forward to try to see if it would reappear in a slightly smaller form, but I couldn't get them to meet! I believe this ties in to my post from earlier this week that I am losing everywhere else first, then the belly is the last to go!! It appears my man boobs, they are deflating apparently and that is ok with me!! I guess I really am holding on to the Monster till the very last!!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Day 81 Really? On a Monday?

Look how close I am getting to day 90!! Woo hoo for me. Don't even really know why I think day 90 is cool. Which leads me to my post for the day. Some days, I just get in the best moods and get all excited about the future and day dream away how things are going to be! Today, I was all smiles when imagining my graduation, I had this vision of me at 180 pounds, I saw me at my first Quorum Court meeting voting on some issue before us, I even saw me in a suit in some Court room making my argument to the judge. I think that is the best thing to come from this journey. I have always been a positive thoughts about the future guy, but my thoughts are even better and clearer now that I know that my future is so much bigger. I know I won't be put in the pine box for my ignorance and unwillingness to change my eating and exercising ways. I guess that I am officially doing the good kind of hoping, not the bad. This hope doesn't leave room for failure, it doesn't give you that option of bowing out. This hope is the one that makes all you have worked for even that much more cherished. It lets you see what you can be, not what you are probably gonna keep on being. That is the hope I have now. I am glad to have found it too.

I also came up with a solution that was somehow beyond me with its simplicity for my walking problem. I am going to get more laps in the morning! I am only looking at 10 more minutes max if I do that, so I am gonna and get my endurance up even more! I am wondering if I will ever get my laps down to sub 4 minutes? I have gotten it down to 4 minutes 20 seconds from the original lap time of 5 so that is something. I think if i keep building my leg muscles and losing the pounds, I can do it! That is another goal of mine now!

Shane watch football! Bye now!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Day 80 Skinny Legs and Skinny Arms

Day 80 is in the books and I am at 1450 calories. I also got a little over 5 miles of walking today. I got my morning 3 miles in, then we walked 2 mile of trails as well. All in all a great day spent with friends and eating healthy as can be!

I have been primarily fixated on my belly in all this weight loss, but I couldn't help but notice that my legs and arms are really shrinking. Which made me remember something my best friend at the time's dad told me. When you lose weight, you generally lose it from the top down, bottom up and from the extremities in. I don't know how true that really is but he seems to have nailed it. So now that my legs are skinnier and my arms are skinnier, I guess that means from this point forward, the belly should be leaving me? I sure hope so!!

Day 79 Shattered Record and a Wierd Sensation

Folks, it was a wonderful wonderful fall day here in the River Valley of Arkansas. The temperature was a high of 80, the sun was out in the clearest blue sky you ever saw, and I enjoyed it the whole day, sort of. As you may recall, I set out to get my 5k time down below 45 minutes this weekend. My previous lowest time for a 5k was 47:29 and I think I set it about a month ago. I am proud to report, that with a litle bit of pushing through and a lot of determination, I shaved my time down to 43:31!!!! It really was a rush to get there! I was so proud of myself, I took the stopwatch by my Mom's house because she was awake at that time and showed her! Now all that is great, but between staying out too late for my reunion Friday night and then pushing to get that time down left me worn out yesterday. It was made worse by the fact that I spent the next three hours after the walk/jog sitting down doing homework. I felt terrible that I was so tired until around 4, because the girls cleaned the heck out of this house and I was of no use at all.

Lauren had a game to cheerlead at yesterday afternoon and that was the most active I was the whole day after the workout. I love watching her cheer, she just shines when she is out there. She is cheering for her school this year so I bought me a team t-shirt. It was one of the first 2x shirts I bought this year and it fit comfortably when I bought it. But, yesterday I kept feeling this wierd tickly sensation around my belly and chest area. It wasn't unpleasant, it was just odd to me. I finally figured it out. My shirt was not taught against me, it was a little loose and that sensation was the shirt rubbing back and forth on my belly hairs! Hah talk about being "tickled"! I know corny, but still.

We had make your own pizza night at the house tonight and it was a big success. I took a play from Sean's playbook and made mine on a Joseph's Pita. I put on a light coating of Bertoli's tomato sauce, 8 turkey pepperonis, about half a sliced mushroom, a little onion, bell pepper and some of the fiesta cheese blend, baked it for a bit, then when it was done, a light coat of salsa. It was a a delicious 230 calories and with the salad added in, I was plenty full. I added a yogurt snack and a stick of the Sargento's Pepperjack cheese for a grand total of 1555 calories for the day. I know that is a little over what I want, but I think that on the days I do the hard pushing 5k's, I am gonna be a little more lenient, not over 1800 or anything, but if I get over 1500 it is ok on those days.

I guess I will get off here and go to bed. I have my 'just finish it' walk for tomorrow and and I need to get some work done on a campaign flyer and a guest post onBecky's Blog next Monday. And we are going to Spiro, Oklahoma today with our friends Jason and Izetta and all our chitlins. They have an old mound site that the Caddoan Native Americans built back in the 800's and it was the center of power for the Native American population of the Southwest Region back then. It is situated on a bend of the Arkansas River and it was the central site of power, trade and commerce for the area. Apparently, the Cadddoans had a very organized government in place and were quite influential for a long time, but the site suddenly became vacant in the 1600's I believe and there is no record to indicate the reason for the fall from power or where that population went. Should be a fun trip! I hope everyone has a great Sunday!!!

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Day 78 20 Year High School Reunion and a Forgotten NSV!!!

Woo hooo! Go Bulldogs! Springdale High School Class of 1990 Rules!!!

Had a great time at my class reunion today and tonight! I saw a lot of folks that I have not seen in years! I got caught up and caught a few folks up and just generally had a great time. We went to the football game but wound up leaving early to get to the restaurant so we could order food without it getting spit in for being there so late, oh and we were getting our butt's stomped on the field too. I saved about 700 calories for the meal last night and didn't use but about 300 of them! We had a good time laughing and talking and reminiscing and it seriously was about the people and not the food! I did get a couple hundred more calories when we got home at midnight as I was starving by then, but the day was qualified as a huge success!

I have been slacking in one of my measurement challenges that I set out in the beginning of my journey. I have not been measuring how big around my belly is lately. I remembered as such today and decided to get a measurement. If memory serves, I believe the last measurement was 53 inches at its widest point. Well the new measurement is now 49 inches at its widest point!!! I have knocked off 4 inches and gotten that bad boy down in the 40's!!! Monster is losing the war!!! Yeah!!!

I sure hope everyone as a great weekend and be thinking of me as I make another push for the sub 45 minute 5k please!

(I am writing this post actually on Saturday morning and am on my second cup of coffee. The enthusiasm may be a bit over the top! Sorry!)

Friday, October 1, 2010

Day 77 Hot 100 Update and Three Things Thursday

Howdy folks! I am in such a good mood, which is probably directly related to the fact that Thursday is my Friday! I love the option of not working on Fridays!! I also love getting my walk on an extra session on Thursdays too. It kinda kicks my butt but it also gives me Fridays to get my legs rested up and I think my legs like that.

So the Hot 100 is going along pretty well for me. I had to amend my bread goal to exclude only white bread and the white bread they dye to look like wheat bread. I really only eat the pitas for bread for the most part. I don't have to worry about Subway now that I know that they have salads. So in its amended form, I am good on the bread goal! I plan on working on the sub 40 minute 5k this weekend by trying to get below 45 minutes on saturday, so more on that one next week. I have successfully been able to add vegetables to my diet, with a minimum of 4 servings a day. And to round out the list, I don't weigh until next Friday, so I can't report on the get to 240 goal until then. I feel thinner I know that!

I am going to try a little gimmick here and see if it sticks. I thought about putting it out there each Thursday that I ask my bloggy buddies to create a list that includes three items. I am not sure if I want to keep the criteria the same or change it up every week. I will work on that, but for this week, here is your challenge folks.

Leave in my comments a list of 3 things that you can do now that you couldn't do before your started on this journey of ours. It don't have to be a huge, oh wow kind of thing. Maybe you couldn't go 10 minutes without somehow thinking about food before. I couldn't. So if you can now, throw that on the list! Maybe you couldn't squat down and get up without putting your hand on something to help you up, I couldn't! Now I can. Maybe you always thought that personal or "me" time only involved being sedentary and not activity. I did! Now I consider my walk around Wal Mart and the block my me time. I get so much thinking and rah rah'ing done So there is my three things for this Thursday. Tell me yours!!

Oh and a couple of side notes here. First, I did get my jump rope workout in and I have determined I have muscles just below my neck that I was unaware of that just keep on hurting from jumping rope! And as far as doing the comparison pics, I honestly have not been able to find a shirt that doesn't poof out at the bottom and make me look fatter than I really am and I will not post a shirt off pick yet!! I need to buy some more shirts apparently!