Today was the day I think. The day that the paradigm shifted and I let go of my disappointment comparing today to 2 years ago and actually embraced this journey on its own merit. When I finished my treadmill jaunt today, I was actually very proud of how well I did compared to last week. After my strength training, I realized how much stronger I am today than I was when I started working out again 2 months ago. I have gone up at least 30 lbs on my bench, 40 pounds on the lat pull down, and yesterday, I did crunches on the big boy apparatus, albeit with no incline on it. The point being that I am invested in this goal/journey and no longer sad sacking about how I screwed up.
One of the things I missed is how I was optimistic about what next week or next month would bring. How fast will I be a month from now? What size shirt will I wear in May? I envision myself thinner, stronger and faster 1,2 or 3 months down the road. I have bought in!! And that bodes well for me!