And the Scale Is My Bitch!

I had only a pretty good week, and guess who still had a loss? That would be this guy here! I dropped 1.2 pounds this week down to 197! I believe I will just go ahead and have another good week dang it! That was enjoyable to see!

I am running another 5k tomorrow. This one is a little different in that it is not one with lots of corporate sponsors, or tons of people. I had asked a friend of mine to go with me to the big daddy of 5k's that is being run tomorrow in a town about an hour or so away from me. He told me he was actually participating in a local 5k that a member of my new church was having. She loves to run but has been having back problems lately and has been sidelined. I think she wants to get back in the groove of running, so she is hosting this shin dig to slowly inch back in. We are having a cookout afterwards and just hanging out in fellowship too. I don't know that I am going to stay long though. I am getting the house to myself and I am thinking I need to be studying seriously for my philosophy final and getting a draft of that essay question written. I also need to start skimming the chapters for sociology so I can find the answers I need on the final. We have had a wild set of circumstances weather wise this semester and so for this test, we are getting to use notes/books to take the test. I am good with that. I just need to have read so I know where the info being asked is.

I was so excited last night. At 8:05 p.m. I walked out of the last lecture class I will ever attend. Law school is taught with the socratic method, and quite frankly, I am excited about that. Turns out I prefer to talk and work things out rather than listen and be hand fed answers. I have often thought that it sucked to have someone else's views of the material be what you had to learn rather than having your our take on the material.

No royal wedding for me today. It is imperative that I get this yard mowed today! I may even have to rake it before all is said and done. I sure hope not dang it.

God Always Gives You What You Need At The Right Time

I wouldn't say I have been struggling like backsliding lately, but I just haven't been where I wanted to be, and my motivation was a little off. I have tried to figure out why and I have tried to power through it. I still work out 4-6 days a week, I am active, but my eating has been not like old days, but it has been less than stellar let's just say. I have tried pep talks and I have blogged openly and honestly about my struggles, and I really have gotten motivation out of both, but yesterday, God gave me what I needed to get my butt back on the wagon. It was a seemingly random experience, until I thought about it.

Kathy and I have a friend, she lives in Kathy's old hometown in Texas, and she had made a comment on Facebook, I had gotten involved in the comment thread and while on it one time, I saw on the left she had a photo album named family, so just to goof off a bit, I clicked on it, was scrolling through the pictures, and then I saw "it". I have a whole bunch of pictures of me being fat. Most I am not proud of. But this picture in her album of me, well it seemed to speak to me. It shocked me. I honestly and truly couldn't believe a) that it was me and b) how it perfectly characterized me at that weight. Here it is:

I mean I had a wow moment. This picture put me on the floor. That facial expression just does it for me. I seriously felt how I look in that picture. I was always tired, felt a little off all the time, and felt like I was the least attractive person ever. This picture, even more so than my Silver Dollar City picture, has left me with a feeling of "seriously? you let yourself get there?" mind set and it also has me feeling very grateful to my God for leading me to the right set of circumstances to lead me away from there too. So though this week has been good, I plan on making it even better, and following up with even better weeks to come. I can not, will not let myself get back there over a little stress and a return to old eating habits. I refer you to the name of my blog. It is for that reason, for my family's future well being, that that picture can never ever leave my mind.

Graduation Approaches

I know this is a weight loss blog, but it is also MY blog, so I get to post what I want! Haha. I posted the following on my Facebook page and felt it so strongly that I stole it for my blog post too:

I am shocked that I got a jump on studying for my finals last night. I didn't even plan on doing it, but hey. I have to formulate an answer to an essay question for Philosophy of Religion still, but that shouldn't take too long. I also need to read two chapter for Social Psychology. I was just thinking of all the times over the past 4 years I would look at the new degree plan my advisor had given me with what classes I had taken checked off and what classes I needed still on it, and thought to myself "gees, will I ever finish all this?" Well, I am one week and one day from doing exactly that, finishing all that. It is pretty exciting. I think my senioritis has even subsided a good deal. I was also looking at my graduation picture from when I received my Associates Degree in 2009, and it is exciting to me that when I get this graduation picture taken, I will be at least 100 pounds lighter than last time. I have said it before and I will keep saying it, God blesses me mightily, and more than I deserve.

End facebook post/

So yesterday was not as good as I would have liked eating wise but it was phenomenal exercise wise. I got thrown off by a habit I have formed that I am going to be in class till 8 or later, so for lunch, I go have a small something at Wendy's. Usually spicy nuggets. I usually study for the hour and go back up and get refills on my soda. Well yesterday I wanted to lose the hassle of having to go to the counter and ask for a refill, so I went to Burger King instead and ordered their spicy chicken sandwich and a soda. WEll I assumed the spicy chicken sandwich would be more calories that the nuggets, but not significantly more. Wrong!! it was 460 calories, which is 245 more than the 5 piece nuggets at Wendy's!! crap! So that was not a situation that I couldn't remedy, but I then was hungry before class, so I ate one of my 140 lunches of one half a sandwich flat and a package of lunch meat before I left, and then had supper when I got home. Again, probably right about where I wanted to be, except! Yeah my evening snacking got a little crazy once again. Had my yogurt, and should have stopped, but didn't. Had my banana with peanut butter, should have stopped, but didn't. I went and got another small but not tiny piece of meatloaf, and then Kathy brought out the Reeses Pieces I bought her for Easter, and I had 7 of those. I was basically out of control last night and I have to have to have to figure this night snacking thing out. Luckily, I am almost done with school, and that lunch thing will handle itself, but this night snacking has got to stop and I mean NOW!

It is my plan that tonight, the second I get home, I am going to get my log out and write down my yogurt, and one other snack and then I am going to blot out the rest of the page with my pen. I will leave no space to write anything else, and that will be that. Uh huh, yeah that is right. Planning, don't fail me now!

Day 1 Back On Track

So Day 1 of being back in the saddle was overall good, but I did tail off last night at the end. Still a residual effect of being off the wagon I am guessing. I was at 470 calories at 5 when I got off work, had supper and a snack that put me at 1600 calories. I then snacked a little more after that and wish that I hadn't. I will be taking care of that today though. I will not snack past 1800 calories and that is that. I did a new thing that worked yesterday. I eat the same thing everyday for breakfast and work, just some quantities vary. I wrote down my intake of food and its calorie count in my notebook I use for tracking at home before I left. I literally ate only that stuff all day! I am gonna try that again today. I liked it. I maybe should try that for my evening snacking rather than leaving it open ended? See, blogging is a life saver. I just figured that out while typing!

Work out time! See ya'll later!

The Break, It's Over

I had to admit it today. I have been on break. I did a whole bunch of weight losing, it took up a great deal of my mental energy for several months. It was fairly well my main focus, even with a family and a career and school, I managed to make it the thing I treasured the most. And then I made my first goal, to get to Onederland. It seems that after that, I kinda decided to go on cruise control. I have a lot going on right now. I really just needed one less thing to think about. So I have done an eeeeeh to poor job in keeping my diet and lately my exercise, to levels that are acceptable to me. I was on a break. And I don't know that this is a bad thing. I have not put on weight, I haven't lost any either. But my main concern is the poor eating habits I am letting slip back in a little at a time. I had a lot of Easter candy yesterday, I had a personal meat lovers pizza and a fajita taco salad on Saturday. I rationalize that I am exercising and being more active in general and those are offsetting any gain that may come. But the truth is, I am not where I need to be yet. I need to be back on track and heading into the 180's. So today, I declare my break over. I am now officially back in the game. I only have two days of class left, then next week is finals. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel for school, so that takes that stress away. Kathy and I had a discussion last night about our financial situation and how we can do better in the future and she seemed really on board with all that we talked about and we are both ready to get this ship righted and headed down smooth waters. My mom and I are back on good terms and she is being a bit more understanding about the demands on my time. And I have found a great church that the whole family likes and wants to be active in. All these things added together leave me in what I believe is a good spot to get started again on challenging my scale to go to the lower numbers! 185, here I come! So for my first goal, I am wanting to be down from the 198 of last Friday to 195 two weeks from last Friday. Goal 1 set. It is on!!!

He Defeated Death And Sin

So today is the day that Jesus rose and defeated death and sin. I thank him for his sacrifice and for delivering us to Heaven. And it also, if you think about it, puts our mutual problem to shame. We eat too much and can't seem to figure out how to make it stop. Yeah, pretty weak if you think about it huh? So let's all take a page from Jesus' book, and rise up and defeat that evil. And think of it as an opportunity to either take your kids nutritional future into your hands. Be to your family what Jesus was to us. A redeemer. Give them the life you didn't have. Deliver them from a life of poor eating habits and low self esteem. Make their path easier than yours. It makes me kinda proud that Lauren is at least questioning some of her eating decisions now. that means she is paying attention, even if the practice of healthy eating is not all the way ingrained, the concept is. Everybody have a Happy Easter.

Motivated > Slacker

That equation has been so true for me the past few months. And with spring yawning and stretching and showing its face, I have been more and more prone to "finding something that needs done" than ever before. Here is what I was thinking about yesterday. It "seems" as though I have developed bad allergies over the past two years. I have to wonder if the reality is that I have had allergies for a while now and just didn't really suffer since, well getting me out from behind a computer screen or out from in front of my tv was next to impossible. I think my heightened symptoms now are due to the fact I actually move my ass and go outside like 1000% more than I used to. I seriously can't just sit still anymore. If I am up and awake and daylight has broken, I am trying to find something I need to be doing outside. I need to mow today, not sure that the rain will let me, so my back up plan is to clean out from under the lean to today and see about getting started on building a chicken coop for our newest family members. That is right, a chicken coop. I am the biggest sucker for Kathy's brown eyes. She has been wanting chickens for quite some time now, and I have held off as long as I can, but she got to me yesterday and I agreed to buy one adult chicken and let it run around the back yard to see how the dogs handled it, see how her and Lauren would do taking care of it. We now own 6 baby chickens that are requiring our care and attention for 4 to 6 more weeks, at which time I need to have figured out some sort of living quarters for them. Yeah, not a sucker at all. So that is on the agenda for the day. I have been working hard on getting my back yard to not be heaven for weeds and bugs. I have spent more money on weed and feed and bug keep away this year than the past 4 combined. I can finally see a light at the end of the tunnel on the weeds I think, the bugs we won't know for sure until June or so. I know that if I get ants again this year, we are moving! I fought them for two months last year before winning, but man that was a fight!

I have a bit of an odd day ahead of me today. I am having lunch with my best friend Jason for his birthday. It was yesterday but he was in Little Rock. I need to get a jog in I think, but have to wait for Lauren's dad or step mom to come get her cause Kathy has to work this morning. I am betting Lauren could stay by herself for a short time, but I don't know where I want to go run or how long I will be gone for sure, so I am not doing that.

Well I have to get Kathy up for work, so talk to ya'll later!